You cannot

You cannot cross the same river twice

You cannot go back to change regrets

You cannot predict where tomorrow carries you

You cannot know then what you know now

You cannot sing an unwritten song

You cannot feel when you are numb

You cannot hear over the noise in your mind

You cannot see what’s right in front of you

You cannot fix what’s meant to break

You cannot heal without looking in the mirror

You cannot run from yourself

You cannot flee your past either

You cannot do what you can’t

But can you do

What you can?

Can you be you?

Be relentless

Be relentless in living

Be relentless in loving

Loving your-self

Be relentlessly happy

Be relentlessly sad

Don’t numb yourself from life

Be you
All of you
Be grateful
For all of you
Be loving
Of all of you
Be gentle
With all of you

And then love thy neighbour as you love yourself

I wanted to give this a try. Not yet happy with it though.

I wrote this because a while back, a long discussion with a friend, highlighted that often adversary we feel towards others, is based on us seeing things in them we do not like about ourselves. So we project our secret self-loathing, or even just the niggling dislikes, onto others. As someone who has very well honed skills in self-loathing I was always intrigued by the commandment of loving ones neighbour as one loves oneself.

You are worth it–always

You are worth all the stars above and the stones below.

You are loved as much as rain falls,
As often as sun shines,
As many times as wind touches your hair.

Over and over again.
Every morning or night,
Every time you come into yourself,
You are told:
You are worth it.
You are loved.

This love is there when you stumble.
This love is there when you cry.
You are worth it in your darkness.
You are worth it in your light.

And if you ever doubt it, doubt that worth of yours.
Then pause and look around you and listen for the love.
Be gentle with yourself.
Forgive the ‘you’ you hate.
And then with arms wide open,
hold your you in tight embrace.

And give this love to yourself.
And give this worth to thee.
This is where we all start out.
On our journey to heal.

Living in Increments

A mathematical model I have just learned

Living in increments
My not so mathematical version:

One day at a time
After ten years had splintered into a million pieces

The screeching of breaks
An unconditional survival function

One step and then another
Mom learning to walk again

One breath at a time
As panic attacks rolled over my body

Tear, by tear, by tear
Washing your pain away

An unsuspected laugh
That ray of hope

A stranger’s smile
We see one another
Just being human

Just being human
Step by step
Day by day
Tear by tear
Smile by smile
Laugh by laugh

Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.

There’s a catch!
First: thou hast to love thyself

First and foremost
Love yourself

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