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Beauty in being

And where love is, there is light
And where light is, there is healing

Bathed in love

Be whoever you want to
Be whatever you take hold of

In your heart
In your soul
In your mind
Just hold onto

Do a cartwheel
Dance around the house
Bake a cake
Snuggle your cat
Run 10k
Read a book
Punch a bag
Hike up a mountain
Draw a picture
Eat some chocolate

Live mercifully
Be mesmerized
See the beauty

Be warm
See the wonders
Love yourself


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 Transition into sleep
Waking up eyes sticky
Moving through the day
As if I owned it
Transitions—in and out
Of awareness
At night
At day
Transitioning into togetherness
After breaking free
Not so much transition
More elemental force
Breaking free
Thrown together
Liminal spaces
In between
The hours, the days, the weeks
In between all of us
Are we seeking to arrive?


Be relentless

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Live relentlessly

Relentlessly optimistic
Relentlessly happy

Give into your sadness with all your being
And let it run, run, down the river

Give into your joy with all your heart
Let your inner child embrace life again

Give into your anger with all your might
Let it rage until your knuckles bleed

Give into your love with all your Self
Let it grow, grow until it leaps onto others

Be relentless
In living this life of yours

Just one rule
Don’t destroy anyone else on the way

Seven Sins Surfacing

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Watch out for your righteousness
It can turn
So very easily
Into self-righteous adulation
Of ego

Watch out for your lies
Your hunger for power
Can turn your win
So easily
Into a loss you cannot predict

Watch out for your hate
It poisons your soul
Each day
You feed it
Until the darkness has swallowed you

Watch out for your greed
Your need to own
To have, to stuff, to fill
You never know
Who holds the keys to these shakles

Watch out for your infidelities
They take
Much more
Than you think
Are you able to pay this bill

Watch out for your envy
Your bitterness
Your bile
Do you want to be beholden
To such masters

Watch out for your laziness
Idle gossip
Your refusal to live
Just sit
And permit the darkness to permeate

What is a meaningful life?

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You meant well?
I mean what I say?
But a mean streak
Works just as well?

Meaningful engagement?
The means to an end?
What does it mean?
What do I mean?

I mean to you?
I mean to myself?
My life means to me?

Just a finite pearlstring
Of events my brain categorises
Into a meaningful story?

But is it meaningful?
This story of mine?
These random encounters
Carefully planned?

And I am simply the narrator?
Maybe not so simple after all?
The narrator creates reality

Without the storyteller
The pearls would tumble through space and time

I tell my life into being

In a teaching observation the person I observed was introducing free will and categories of determinism to the class. So I tried playing with the ideas.

Parental Alienation Day: Live Light Installation

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Light Installation / video

Today I am not sharing my own work, but the work of my partner. He has worked in light-design for over 17 years, and on parental alienation day 2019, finally decided to create his own designs. The development took about a month, and as any good perfectionist, there are much more and more sophisticated things to be done if there would have been more time. The LED screen is 7×2 meters.

Background Interview

I interviewed dad erased before the live stream.

What was your inspiration?

I wanted to use colour and movement within the words displayed to highlight my own personal fears, anxieties, worries, and hate (anger) in dealing with parental alienation What inspired me were a lot of the words from various Twitter, Facebook, Blogs account of people talking about their own experiences of dealing with Parental Alienation and how they miss their kids, and the fights they have with systems that are adversarial; who choose to have a winner and a looser.

The other part of the inspiration (or admiration) is how, even after 10/12 years of battling with everything being against them in most cases they eventually are able to have an ongoing relationship with their kids. The saddest ones I have not talked about are the relationships that have not been fixed, the utterly completely broken relationships, and how it affects the targeted parents and the children as well, and sometimes it doesn’t get fixed, and it is such a loss of time, such a loss of time.

How did you go about developing the installation?

How I have done it is: this is just a tiny glimpse into how I feel about parental alienation. There is so much more that you could say; you could spend years researching PA and come up with so many different scenarios and situations and feelings and words. What I am trying to say is … the more I get into it; the more feeling I get behind it, and hopefully I can express better how I deal with it or how I am not dealing with it as an alienated parent myself.

What do you want to achieve?

I want to give a voice to the unseen who are lost in an adversarial system who chooses to establish winners and losers, and ultimately fails our children.

This is the glossary for the Abbreviations Section:

SAID – Sexual Allegations in Divorce
CIAF – Child Impact Assessment Service
VotC – Voice of the Child
CMS – Child Maintenance Service
CSA – Child Support Agency
PASG – Parental Alienation Study Group
PAAO – Parental Alienation Awareness Organisation
Cafcass – Children and family court advisory and support Service
NAAP – National Association of Alienated Parents
MATCH – Mothers apart from their children
FNF – Families need Fathers
JUMP – Jewish Unity for Multiple Parenting
FPS – Family Psychology Solutions
DADs – Dads Against Double Standards
PAPA – Parents Against Parental Alienation
F4J – Fathers for justice
SPARK – Support for the Parentally Alienated thru Random Acts of Kindness
PTSD – Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
WHO – World Health Organisation
AAPA – Association Against Parental Alienation
PAS – Parental Alienation Syndrome
SPAN – Stop Parental Alienation Now
PAWWSG – Parental Alienation World Wide Support Group
FRI – Fathers Rights Ireland
EAPAP – European Association of Parental Alientation Practitioners
PAAA – Parental Alienation Awareness Association
HAP – Hostile Aggressive Parenting
PAA – Parental Alienation Awareness
NAOPAS – National Association of Parental Alienation Specialists
PASI – PAS Intervention
NPO – National Parents Organization
CSPAS – Canadian Symposium For Parental Alienation Syndrome
PAD – Parental Alienation Disorder
ECTHR – European Court of Human Rights
ECHR – European Convention of Human Rights
HRA – Human Rights Act
Unicef – UN Convention on the Rights of the Child
PEF – Platform for Europeans Fathers
ICD-11 – WHO International Classification of Diseases
JM2P – I Love My 2 Parents
APIPDF – Association for Parental Equality and Children’s Rights
BOLD – bubbles of love day
HCS – High Conflict Separations
CAFE – Canadian Association for Equality